The Kidney Dilemma

I knew that my husband's liver was the problem, but didn't know why. I knew that he was going into septic shock, but didn't know why. I knew that he was really sick, but didn't know why. No one seemed to, really. It was frustrating. The first morning we were there, he was given a CT scan with IV contrast-- Something that isn't good for your kidneys. As a matter of fact, it is recommended that an individual wait 48 hours to have it done again. 

Unfortunately, the doctors didn't know what was going on and they needed to do a more thorough CT scan. (If you recall, the idiot in the ER suggested my husband had liver cancer... That's all we were going on at this point.) They needed to do another CT scan immediately.

I will never forget what the Infectious Disease doctor, Dr. Trehan, said: 

   It is better to have a live man with a bad kidney than a dead man with a good kidney.

Kristin was with me when he said this. I was a bit taken aback by what he said, but he was asking me to consent to doing this IV contrast CT scan, and basically put his life at risk. Again. I mean, I had consented to putting him on a ventilator and into a coma earlier in the day. It was yet another punch in the gut.

The two doctors (I can't remember the name of the other one) babbled some medical jargon, which I didn't understand. Kristin looked at me and said, "They need to do this CT scan to see why he is so sick. Sign the papers." So, I signed the papers.

You see, I needed someone to tell me what to do. I needed someone to listen for me and to essentially translate what the doctors were saying into just a couple of words. So, I signed the papers. They had said something about temporary dialysis if needed... I felt as though I gave my husband a death sentence. I was terrified.

Unfortunately, his renal function went up. he swelled up like a balloon. It was horrible. I mean, he was REALLY swollen. They wanted to cut off his wedding ring. Fortunately, Sally told me what to do in order to get his ring off safely. (Watch the video here - AMAZING!)

I was able to get his ring off, but his renal function was far from normal. So, it was yet another obstacle-- first his liver, next his kidneys. It was horrible. HORRIBLE. I can't even describe it to you. I was watching my husband's body shut down, and there was nothing I could do except follow the advice of the doctors-- Most of whom I had never met before.

I wore my husband's ring in hopes that I would be able to give it back to him. I had never wanted to give someone a piece of jewelry so bad in my entire life. It was just... heartbreaking. I am not used to feeling helpless, and there was just nothing that I could do except wait, pray and hope.